Its good to catch up with your children once in a while. I don’t mean the occasional phone call that asks them how they are doing and the occasional email or text sent when they need something. I mean really catching up.
Daughter 1 is back home for a time now. The first thing Daughter 2 noticed about Daughter 1 was that ” she had done her eyebrows”. So a comment was passed between us. I am one for a totally natural look- I prefer to walk around with all the hair God has given us, even the ones on my upper lip and especially the ones on my body. An exception has been made in certain areas of my body for hygiene reasons but otherwise, a razor or the wax and me have had no significant meetings. Daughter 1 is not a hairy girl. But under peer pressure, she started getting her body hair removed ever since she went to college and has ever since. In the past this has led to arguments between us but now we have reached a situation of equilibrium, where I have accepted her without hair and she has sort of accepted my view on hairy bodies. ( I like even men hairy- call me weird, if you will).
So last week, Daughter 1 came with her eyebrows all shaped and trimmed and whatever the words are. To tell the truth, I never noticed till daughter 2 mentioned it. My daughters and I are blessed or cursed with very little eyebrow hair. It never grows, falls, or has shape. It has been and always looks the same- there may be about 35 hairs in each of our eyebrows- that is it.
At the end of the conversation I had with her, she mentioned – I am an adult now, ma, nearly 25 and I did it with my own money. That silenced me and got me thinking.
Over the past week, every conversation we have had seems to end with that statement- I am adult now ma.
Who is growing up and who needs to grow up now ?
I think it is me- I have never had her make comments about my appearance, my fatness or thinness or my white hairs or black hair. Isn’t it time for me to treat her as she treats me- fair and just.