Following up on my post ” Inspiration“, written a few days back, I want to write an update.
I am reading Norman Vincent Peale’s book, You can if you think you can. Each word seems to resonate with me- I feel like he was speaking to me through many of the instances he has written about. He has inspired me to start thinking of my dream of going back to college ( at 47!) to complete my education.
On a personal front, I decided to try to apply some of the principles he advocated in my life- call it my Late New Year Resolutions, if you will. Most of his writing is about how to make people like you and how to make more friends and be a success socially among other things.
A few weeks back, I wrote about a difficult experience at work, one I was embarrassed about. I don’t feel so embarrassed any more. Yesterday I passed the woman in the incident, totally unexpectedly. I saw her from afar off but couldn’t recognize her from that distance. She was smiling and waving her hands at me. When we came close, I realized all of a sudden, who she was. I was about to cringe in embarrassment but by God’s grace, I was able to gracefully return her greeting and pass her by. I can only account for this by two reasons : 1. My constant giving of thanks and acceptance of the life lesson made me humble enough to be able to face her and my God gave me this opportunity and the courage to handle this incident and gave me a chance to change it into an opportunity. Well, I could easily have run off or turned the other way but I looked her in the eye and wished her back. Isn’t that a positive outcome ? Norman Vincent Peale talks about this too- embarrassments come to everyone, in one form or the other- it is up to us to make an opportunity out of it.
There is another woman who works in the HR department of our university. I don’t have too good a relationship with her – for some reason we don’t vibe well. Nothing specific but we are not friends. We pass each other in the corridors, sometimes I ignore her and sometimes she ignores me but we do know who the other one is. I know I have not behaved well with her in ignoring her when I met each other and I know she has hurt me in the past too and that I have borne grudges. Yesterday, by a strange turn of events, it happened that the elevator I took to go down to the underground parking lot was the same elevator she took too- at the very same time, after work. There was no way I was going to retract my feet, me reading Norman Vincent Peale and all- I had to deal with my inner demons.
Waiting for the elevator together, I flashed her a million dollar smile- it made me feel warm inside, believe me. She returned the smile- perhaps she was sick of the bad looks we gave each other too. In the elevator, I needed to search for my car keys which as usual had settled down to the bottom of my hand bag. Digging down into my bag for my keys, I muttered to myself, ” Always digging”. She looked at me curiously. I explained as if we were long lost friends, ” I have a habit of always having to dig in my handbag to find things, keys, mobile, purse- you name it I have done it”. She laughs and said, she was the same- she said,” I am the same. I have a handbag with side pockets in which I keep all my important things, so I can fish things out in a jiffy. I have never been able to find another handbag like that, she concluded. We laughed together and I said, ” My husband often tells me , of what use is a mobile phone to you ? You miss all calls digging in the depths of your handbag.” This brought another round of laughter and the ice of so many days was broken. In companionable silence, we traveled as elevator- buddies till we parted on a good note in the car park.
See what I mean, God works in mysterious ways. I had been praying ever since I started reading NVP again that- please give me a chance to mend relationship with Mona and it happened.
We need to go out of our spheres of comfort and make the effort to put the other person at ease. AS it says in the Bible ” Seek and ye shall find”. I sought and I found. I am going to keep on working on all my failed/failing relationships. I believe I can do it.